Self designed Happiness! 

I know I am not regular with my posts,  but please bare with me. I also thank those beautiful souls who have managed to read my long posts amidst their busy schedule. This one is going to be about what could possibly make you content. 

Think. Try. And Take pride! 

Happy reading! 

There are sometimes when I find happiness in the smallest things I do! And until recent, I hadn’t realised how important it is to praise myself, and what difference that would make!!
Very often, I have heard it from my friends, from acquaintances and the rest of the world, including my inner voice regarding the dissatisfaction about ourselves. We do not find anything special, or unique about ourself. We are frustrated with the fact that “Everybody around us are making it BIG unlike us”. We feel incapacitated and unworthy for a lot of things. We wait for a day, for that MIRACLE to happen, where your inner voice says “I am the only one, and I am the best”, because the whole world believes so!! 

But, is it always possible for us to receive every little appreciation and compliment from the world, that we expect for? 
Let’s take an example of a baby.. When a baby is born, and is let out in the world, every little thing that the baby does, is appreciated by people around. The baby blinks, and the people around go, Aweee! The baby makes some gesture, and it’s received with a broad wide smile. The first time a baby gets up and walks, the mother, or any significant person cherishes it and motivates the baby. Even before all these, right after the baby is born, the birth of the baby is celebrated!! So much of celebration and appreciation from the external world.. and the baby automatically does well.. I mean, “performs” well! This is the case of most babies, but there are also other babies, who have not had such an eventful early days, who haven’t gotten anybody to look out and appreciate, who haven’t had the affection or care they should receive, yet, they do walk or talk, all by themselves, with the effort of themselves!!  
There are two cases above.. and the typical way of how those babies would develop is.. In the first case, the baby is given with a lot of external care, appreciation and acceptance that it continues to seek out in the world even after growing to be an adult which could result in disappointment/narcissistic behaviour, Or since baby has been given with enough in the childhood, because of which as an adult, the individual is able to give out to others. In the second case, the baby either develops with a negative view of the world because nobody gave the baby anything and hence, as an adult could be antisocial or the baby could be more striving and resilient towards the world because the individual has learnt how not to give up right from their childhood. (Neither is good, nor bad!! Because every human being is unique and different) 

But……. Why speak about this? In either cases, at some point of time, we may become in such a manner where we need external motivation. But, can we always get it? Will we always have it? I am sorry to say this, but it’s a no!! 

We might think we are giving it for others, but it does not have to be true that it’s always received by the person on the receiving end! And hence, it does not have to necessarily mean that we will get it from others! Also, the way we want ourselves to be understood, or appreciated, and how we want it and in what way we want it, is strictly designed by us, because of which the expectation could be high, and hence, when received.. that might not come as genuine, and we might end up doubting that. We end up doubting if we are really deserving, we question if the appreciation is genuine, we challenge the entire world saying its a bad place!! And since, we do not think we are good enough, or since we (strongly) believe that there is nothing special about us, even when someone says it, we might not trust it! 
What can help? 

When you have time, whatever you do, could be turned into something that could get you happy. Take an example of cooking some dish.. You are creating something. You are putting in your ideas, thoughts and effort in making something from mere nothing!! You are the creator there. Hence take pride!! An other example could be, designing your own clothes.. While you are going to a tailor, maybe taking a simple sketch of the design that you always wanted or, dreamt off could again mean.. That you are the creator of the dress that you are going to wear!! 

You could arrange your wardrobe again, or clean your room. You could buy a new set of flowers for the vase that’s lying around in the corner of the house. You could take a walk, or sit at the park and observe how people are made up! You could doodle, or write, or compose or sing. You could dance, or run, or exercise, or eat differently!! All of these, could be an act of self designed happiness, if you realise that you are making a difference in your life. Only if!! 

Self designed happiness!! There are little things you do! Every day, a little change.. Maybe looking at the newly bloomed flower in your garden and appreciating it’s miraculous beauty or changing the way your wardrobe looks and arranging it neatly!! 

This is something that I created! The dress that I am wearing here.. is something that I designed! The material I felt it, selected it and bought it! Everytime I wear this, it gives me happiness, that cannot be explained. I feel proud, although this might not be a great design. I feel happy, although it’s not entirely made by me (cuz, tailor did a great job and I wouldn’t take credits for that)!! But, I know I have contributed to it, and this little contribution makes a difference for me! Because, I cherish it, and I own it! 

Start making a difference in your life.. Little little differences! Observe it, experience it, and cherish it. Appreciate yourself, take pride, talk about it to people who you think are the ones who really care, share it with others even if you might not receive a positive comment. But design the change yourself, and once you do it, own it! 

Happy designing. 

Happy living!! 


Clothing and accessories detail:

Dress: Self designed. 😛

Material: Pantheon road, Chennai! 

Watch: Titan for women. 

Sling bag: Spar market

Neck chain: Psybaba’s Bohemia, Bangalore

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